Close to the end

The anxiety I felt from the horrifying surgery has been too much to bare. I have been left dealing with somataform disorder or 'somatic' disorder. I blame myself, it was my choice to believe in plastic surgery that ruined my life. It was one persons decision to do 'standard' procedures and ruin my body which led to severe panic attacks and severe pain manifesting in my body. I've been praying to god day and night to undo the plastic surgery operations I've had. I don't understand why Dr Corazon didn't listen to me and why she decided to do something completely different to what we agreed.  But I have a feeling it is because she wanted to train two trainees in standard procedures.

I'm left here to bare the pain and regret. And it's too much for me. I'm left taking pain killers and muscle relaxants. This is a lesson learned the hard way. I wish I fought my desire for plastic surgery.

This just goes to show folks, when the Devil arises, the weak go forth. And that's exactly what happened. The Devil whispered in her ear and she said yes. Because apparently training two students and making a little extra $$$ is that important.

The worst part is she really lied about her offences even though she did nothing in our agreement.

I take accountability for trusting a greedy person with my body.

Now I am going to succumb to death. Because I can't handle the anxiety of what has happened to my body.

People remember don't believe in plastic surgery.

It's not worth it when it ruins your life.

Finding Acceptance

What is done is done and there is not much to do about it.

After that experience I will never trust a person ever again, especially not with my body unless I have to.

The truth is, this woman just wanted to do what was most convenient for her that her collegues would approve of.

The nose imposition was her collegues decision, the 'general' liposuction was to entertain two graduates on how to perform liposuction. And emptying the buccals out was just more convenient than a minor resection.

Its not to say she didn't put time and effort on my nose. But it was a totally dysmorphic vision. I have more photos where you can see after the tipped drooped more.

I really do question Phillipinos level of intelligence to revere a person who does low standard work. But I guess she was ahead of her time when the Plastic Surgery Era began.l in the Philippines.

The fact that level of imposition is accepted makes me understand one of the differences between 'third world' and 'first world'.

Ive done allot of meditation and frequency therapy to recover from the suffering. I will never trust a plastic surgeon again, unless I absolutely must. If I could change the past; I would only trust god with my body.

I had no idea I bought into this deceptive reality and believed people cared. The love of money is to great for others to love God.

The second hardest thing through all of this is staring at the mirror; knowing myself was taken away from me. When I made this decision I was in dire straights and desperate to be beautiful. I should have known better than to trust what I read on the internet.

The hardest thing, is having faith that I can look like me again.

Even if I have to transform every part of me to light. I will do so; I will find a way.

I believe in karma.

Something incredible hapenned to me recently. That was revealed to me, that nobody gets away with anything and that this reality is more illusionary than we know. Especially appearances. I know Dr Corazon Collantes will get karma for what she did and I really feel sorry for her, because I know she will come back and experience it herself.

Well thats it

I'm losing control over my body and the bad smell is re-appearing to my left ear. I don't have the energy to keep getting tests and antibiotics make me sick. I guess this insane woman was allowed to disfigure me, make me sick and leave me for dead, and she gets away with it.

I can't believe this is the kind of world I'm living in, and these kinds of decietful selfish, greedy people are what I'm dealing with.

No lawyer wants to help me unless I pay them allot of money, which I don't have. I'm desperately spending everything I have to try to get better.

It's time for me to let go and let nature finish me off. I hope Dr Corazon collantes feels proud of her quick botch lipo, and humpy droopy nose impositions. I never would have thought, if philipinos think she is a great surgeon then either they have extremely low standards or they are highly unintelligent people.

These people are so bad and so selfish, when they do something wrong they do nothing but try to cover their tracks. In all honestly, I wish Dra. CORAZON COLLANTES lifetimes of extreme pain, suffering and hardship and if I survive, I don't want anything to do with people. I prefer to live alone in the hills, away from people.

I am truly hurt and scarred, and most the lawyers in the Philippines are entirely too self interested to help.

What a bad, horrible and nasty person. What a terrible choice. Nobody would expect to come out looking worse and become extremely sick as the result of a surgeons who cuts corners to increase their profit. Lies, and hires cheap surgeons to do her work.

I want everyone to know, Dr Corazon is a bad person and an unethical surgeon and she should never have been allowed to keep her license. God saw everything she did, and all her lies to cover herself. All to save a buck. Geez. So done with this world. How can people like that be allowed to do what they do, and how could I have been so stupid to buy into her delusion.